Hope

Hurdle after hurdle,
I've stumbled,
I failed,
I cried,
An emotional roller coaster for a whole year,
But this time,
I trip again,
A hard and harsh one,
I bleed and bleed,
Covered in red liquid,
A bruise and bloated face,
I tried to put on a smile,
But nobody cares,
I tried to smile,
Not for others,
But for myself,
For myself,
To remain calm,
To remain hopeful,
To remain in grateful,
For the opportunity,
For the sick and sad,
For the tears and smile,
For everything and anything,
To get better once,
When the sun shine,
I would be able to smile fully,
Without fear of breaking,
Hope,
The only thing I have left.

02092015 1441

Masa dan Kerja

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.

Assalamualaikum wbt :)

jangkaan masa from different 'planet'

Beberapa minggu lepas dan akan datang, banyak sangat kerja yang perlu diselesaikan, yang mungkin akan menyebabkan mentally and physically drained.

Bila difikirkan semula. 24 jam itu memang tidak akan cukup pun untuk semua orang buat semua kerja yang sepatutnya dilakukan dalam 24 jam. Tapi, kenapa Allah masih bagi manusia, hambaNya, 24 jam juga?

Soalan itu terbit bila tengah mengeluh banyak sangat kerja. Soalan itu juga yang buat saya termenung panjang. Dari soalan itu juga, timbul kepercayaan dan rasa malu. Kenapa?

Mudah. Sebab DIA tahu yang 24 jam itu sebenarnya cukup untuk hambaNya. Masa itu cukup, kenapa perlu mengeluh yang ianya tidak cukup? Dari situ timbul rasa malu.

Yang perlu adalah mengeluh sebab diri tidak menggunakan masa itu sebaiknya.

Banyak je kerja. Tapi, kerja yang banyak itu, kalau difikirkan je memang tidak akan berkurang.

Bangun dan buat je yang akan menyelesaikan kerja-kerja tu.

Keutamaan dalam menyiapkan kerja pun penting. Kalau kerja yang perlu dihantar sebulan akan datang didahulukan dengan kerja yang perlu hantar esok, bukan ke menyakitkan jika nak disiapkan hari ini?

(Bukanlah nak kata yang kerja deadline sebulan kene tunggu last minute juga baru boleh siapkan. I think that you know what I meant by that)

Kerja banyak je. Kerja mana yang kita pilih untuk kita buat dan siapkan, terserah pada masing-masing. Masa tetap akan berjalan.

Gunakan masa dengan sebaiknya, dengan sebetulnya, insyaAllah, keberkatan itu akan datang.

Thats it for now.

Semoga semua dilindungi dan diberkati Allah SWT.

Assalamualaikum wbt

akmal

11.44 pm

2/3/2015

L i m i t ?

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim. Assalamualaikum wbt

Everyone ada limit, yang mana sampai satu masa, nak tinggalkan semua benda. Itu tak salah, in fact its just makes you more human.

Limit diri setakat mana yang mampu dibawa, itu diri sendiri yang letakkan, sebab diri lagi tahu diri (well, not necessarily). Andai kita selalu jumpa dengan the wall of limit in most of things that we do, itu maknanya Allah nak beritahu yang kita tak sampai limit kita lagi. Kita boleh jadi lebih dari apa yang kita sangka.

Andai kita boleh buat/beri lebih, kenapa nak buat/beri kurang? (tapi bukan buat/beri something yang langgar Islam ye)

Buat semua dengan sebaik mungkin, so that kita takkan regret dengan tindakan kita nanti.

Its a challenge from HIM, why decline that? DIA kan lebih tahu daripada kita.

Face that challenge with alhamdulillah and lets do our best ok 

Sampai ketemu, Assalamualaikun wbt :)

Akmal

01022015

1030

Trapped

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.

Assalamualaikum wbt :)

I've failed again regarding 'updating my blog atleast XX per month -_-'

>.<


Trapped? Why?

I've been and still reading this manga called Literature Girl. I don't know how I found that, but it has become one of my favourite manga ;)

One of the story was closely related with Osamu Dazai's work titled Ningen Shikkaku (I first thought that it was a fictional novel --"). 

"....Ningen Shikkaku deals with a character hurtling headlong towards self-destruction, all the while despairing of the seeming impossiblity of changing the course of his life. The novel is told in a brutally honest manner, devoid of all sentimentality. The book is one of the classics of japanese literature and has been translated in several foreign languages.." 
[quoted from all-the-worth-trusty wiki]

Ok, now forget about the novel.

What really astonished me was the fact that in the manga, it portrays how most of us wearing a single mask just to fit in with the society around us. Put on a fake smile and chit-chatting happily with people, a forced behaviour. Some can pull it off amazingly and become a great actor without anyone noticing while some just can't. 

'You wear your mask naturally' -Quoted from Liar Game korean ver.

The same principle put in the drama. People often wear their own fake mask before stepping outside their comfort zone. As I said, some wear it naturally and some are forced to wear it. 

As stated in the drama, the reason that most of us wear it because of our surrounding and the basic of all, our aim.

If our aim is to please people, we will wear a mask that will make them 'like' us.

It may be ok for people who wear it naturally, with no pressure being put upon them, to act that way. But, what happened with people who force themselves to wear it so that he/she can be accepted in the society. How long will it last before that person break down? How long will it take for people around him/her to notice that the person they are talking to is not the real one?

But then again, is it really ok for us to leave the people who wear the mask naturally, as if nothings going on within them?

A mask that will torned the self from within. A mask that some of us may not even noticed that they're wearing it either all the time or sometimes. 

A so-called TRAPPED within our own mind.

Released that mask, move away from it. Put on the burden on your shoulder and live the life as the way it should be. Not the way the society portrayed. Smile brightly and Cry if the eyes can no longer hold onto the tears. Do things that you like even if people calls you crazy.

As for those who are watching these co-called normal behaviour, look back again at our family, our friend, our colleague etc, look again at their faces when talking. If you can see through them, help them with their problems. Even a short text will do such as "stay strong, I'll always be besides you, insyaAllah" etc. By Allah's will, I'm sure that it'll help those people who are scared to take off their mask.

As for us, GET BACK to HIM and STAYS with HIM is the only way for us to rip off the mask from our face, our mind, our soul. The one and only way.

Wallahu'alam.

I'm sorry if what I'm babbling about makes no sense --" and its a melancholic one >.<

Thats it for now. Bye,


Assalamualaikum wbt :)